Drunken debauchery isnt a new item on my menu .I grew up in a logging camp where my mom worked as a cook and part time sap sucker . Times were more than tough I wasnt big enough to work in the woods and mom was losing her looks due to her turpentine/gin addiction. I had been violated (all in good fun)by some of moms logging buddies for years and thought that I could make a go of it in the city. My delusions of absolute grandeur and fantasies of being plowed by Brad Pitt were dashed as the only employment I could find was as a condom recycler at a Korean whorehouse.(bring your own). Until I met Frank Rothststein he was a Rabbi and a flaming homosexual craigslist poster with a penchant for dingleberries,of which I had plenty . Frank and I had good times he would make soup out of my shitballs and I would drink mai-tais and enjoy his gagging sounds. Things were great until my mom tracked me down and started shaking me down for money mommy knew that all of my dingleberries were fake because I was born with a rare genetic diseaese that made my anus and buttcheeks incapable of creating stinky love balls for my man. I had been buying shit covered hairballs from homeless men for years and trusted my asshair guys with my life .I decided these wine swilling shitball men should kill my mom. The plan went wrong and I was forced to go underground and leave my wealthy shiteating lover. I was living on the streets and trying to sell other mens shitballs for money ,things were tough but it was all I had I had become a DINGLEBERRY hustler. Then I drank Pabst blue ribbon and my life is great blah blah blah. Thanks PBR.

sfo Another Thanksgiving past < - > 2006-11-25 15:00:26My dad and some other older guys were in the basement drinking beer and watching sports on tv ,I stayed upstairs to help my mom and aunts prepare food and to hang out with my sexy cousin Frank. Im a little older than Frank but always found his long blonde hair and surfer body to be a real turn on.I had only seen Frank about twice a year since ever I caould remember and no longer thought of him as an annoying younger cousin.At 19 he had filled out in all the right places and I noticed a very manly bulge in Franks pants as he did his best to help with the holiday feast. I motioned for Frank to follow me outside so we could burn one, with hand signals and a nod of the head my plan was set in action. When we got outside and we were halfway thru our joint I just said it outright,"Frank I need your cock in my mouth"!! Frank beat me pretty bad and broke four of my ribs all the while puffing on the joint and calling me a cocksucking fairey .During the beating he mentioned he wasnt really a fan of weed anyway and prefered pabst blue ribbon. My broken nose didnt heal correctly and had to be rebroke 3 times.But I did try the beer and it was great . Thanks cousin Frank.

sfo X mas 4 years ago And late on rent and needed a starter in my crappy 1984 ford . I didnt know where I was gonna get the money to live ,let alone for xmas dinner. Around this time I started eating out of dumpsters and shoplifting alot and getting high off hairspray. One of my best friends was a dumpster diver and sphincter sniffing junkie named Bobby Scrotum ,everyone called him BS for short. He turned me on to alot of things like Gay rape,self sucking,multiple sodomistic relationships,and a beverage call pabst blue ribbon. Im dying of the aids virus and never straightened my life out. Thanks Bobby Scrotum.

Dante had a dreary existance toiling day after day in the ass picking salon . Old and overweight homos have a problem picking the dried semenal chunks from there hair covered flabby cheeks .So Dante had to go to work on there love cracks. After years of sniffing dried anal cum mixed with diareah Dante became addicted and couldnt even face the day without at least two or three lines of dried cum or powdered fecal powder. Quitting seemed impossible it was the typical downward spiral of a crack addict. Until one day when a kindly transvestite Eric was servicing gave him a wonderful new beverage called PABST BLUE RIBBON. His life quickly turned around and now he works for the President of the United States of America as a military advisor. Thanks PBR!!!!

sfo Eric liked fires and the excitement ,all the people running the lights the sirens. As soon as Eric graduated from retarded fuck school he tried to join the FD but was turned down due to his stupidity and penis boils. He started lighting fires at abanded buildings and Chinese nail salons .Only places that were an eyesore to the community anyway. Around christmas time he torched a senior home figuring he was doing a favor to society by burning the old money grubbing bastards that were just taking up space and eating valuable cream corn that could have satiated his empty gullet. Eric accidently caught himself on fire and was burned to death whilst screaming in mortal agony. I like this story and love PABST BLUE RIBBON. THANKS PBR!!!

Devan woke up in a putrid mood stinking of cigarettes and other men , I was still slightly tipsy from the night before of sitting by the phone waiting for him to call and at least tell me he was delayed or where he was at, I finished off a few bottles of chardonnay and passed out. I dont know when he dragged his cheatin ass home but it had to be after four because I went to bed around 3:30. I was fumbling to get into my man thong and skin tight snake skin shorts so I didnt see the blow coming.He hit me in the left temple and I went down like a very feminine but still manly bag of potatoes. I layed there stunned with my thong around my ankles in disbelief at the whole situation and thinking of my cake decorating business. Devan pounced like a wild muscled beast and before I knew what was happening he had penatrated my unlubed and slightly crusty boybung. He went at me hard like Mike Tyson on crack had suddenly developed a taste for gay rape. I begged him to stop but he could tell I didnt mean it and so he just kept pumping away at my shredding anal pit. Afterwards we showered and made Feta&Spinach ommellets and I knew my shit covered cunt was safe for at least a week until it scabbed over. Devan took me out for diapers and a tasty new treat of a beverage called Pabst Blue Ribbon. It changed our relationship and now Devan only violates me after I consume at least a 12 pack. Thanks PBR and ¢¾Devan.

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